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Addressing
the Needs of the "Silent Victims" of Domestic Violence |
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In homes where domestic violence
occurs, children are at high risk of suffering physical abuse
themselves. Regardless of whether children are physically abused,
the emotional effects of witnessing domestic violence are very similar to
the psychological trauma associated with being a victim of child
abuse. Each year, an estimated minimum of 3.3 million children
witness domestic violence.
The entire community feels the negative effects of
domestic violence on children. Children from violent homes have
higher risks of alcohol/drug abuse and juvenile delinquency. Today's
child growing up in a violent home may be tomorrow's prison inmate.
A great majority of violent criminals were raised in abusive homes. |
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Consider the following facts: |
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More
than half of the children whose mothers are battered are likely to
be physically abused themselves. |
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Whether
or not the children are physically abused, they often suffer
emotional and psychological trauma from living in homes where their
parents' abuse each other. |
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Violence
may pass from generation to generation. Most experts believe
that children who are raised in abusive homes learn that violence is
an effective way to resolve conflicts and problems. |
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| Family violence is a widespread problem in
our society. It cuts across all racial, ethnic, religious,
educational, economic and sexual orientation backgrounds. |
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How can I tell if a child may be living in
a violent home?
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Unusual
or unexplained injuries |
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chronic
illness, headaches, or stomachaches |
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Signs
of neglect, such as poor hygiene or dirty clothing |
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Withdrawal
(for example, playing alone and having no friends). |
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Depression
or low self-esteem. |
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Use
of violence to solve conflicts. |
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Trouble
falling or staying asleep, or sleeping during school. |
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Flashbacks
or nightmares. |
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Difficulty
expressing emotions other than anger. |
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School
problems, including lengthy absence. |
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Acting
overly responsible (as if the are "the adult" of the
family. |
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| Tips for working with and caring for a
child from a violent home: |
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Set
clear limits and be consistent in how you reward success and how you
deal with misbehavior. |
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Be
honest, let the child know what you can and can't do to help and
don't make promises that you can't keep. |
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Help
reduce stress, create a calm, safe environment. |
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Encourage
play, help a child break free from the isolation, provide lots of
opportunities for play, especially with other children. |
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Promote
healthy self-expression, teach the child to express feelings through
talking, writing, drawing, and music, not violence. |
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Teach
self-control, help the child stay in control when angry or
frustrated (by counting to 20, taking a time out, etc.). |
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Build
self-esteem, encourage the child to believe that he or she is worthy
of love, not abuse. |
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Tell
the child often that he or she is not responsible for violence at
home. |
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